Chapter 14: The Courage to Let Go
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After the Qur’an class, Naasir sought Muneer’s opinion about what happened earlier at Ummu Twins’ place. Since Muneer was also male, he felt he could provide some Islamic-guided insights into the situation.
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He didn’t give specifics i.e mention his name or Bushrah’s, rather he asked in a general sense.
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“Is it… I mean what if or what happens if a young Muslim finds himself attracted to another Muslimah that he works with?”
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Muneer regarded Naasir for a while, the latter hoping Muneer couldn’t see through him, given how he was fidgeting.
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“Well, it depends” Muneer started slowly.
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“On what?” Naasir chanced a glance at his teacher. A small knowing smile graced his lips. The smile disappeared though when their eyes met.
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Naasir groaned inwardly. Does he suspect I’m talking about myself?
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“On how the young Muslim man wants to channel his feelings. Does he just acknowledge them and ask Allah’s guidance on how to control them? Or does he want to give vent to these feelings for example starting an illicit relationship with her?”
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“By illicit relationship, you mean dating right? Boyfriend/girlfriend?”
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Muneer nodded. “Including hook ups, situationships etc.”
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Naasir let out a breath. He had never for once thought of starting any relationship with Bushrah. He only knew that he was beginning to like her… and that was it. The future had never occurred to him. It might have later on but it hadn’t at present.
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Naasir cleared his throat. “I doubt this young Muslim man has any intentions of starting an illicit relationship with the Muslimah in question. As a matter of fact, I’m sure she would never agree.”
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“That’s good because there is no allowance in Islam for dating which is prevalent nowadays. This type of courtship only paves the way for fornication and other ills. S.e.x before marriage is a major sin as seen in Qur’an 24:2. So it is best to stay far away from avenues that could lead to it.
I would advise the young Muslim to keep fasting and try not to be in seclusion with the Muslimah because the prophet said: No man is alone with a woman but the Shaytaan will be the third one present.”
This means that the Shaytaan will tempt them to sin and they will most likely fall for it. May Allah guide and strengthen this young striving Muslim and us. Aamen.”
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*******
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All the way home, a lone thought plagued Naasir’s mind.
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Sholape.
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Should he be grateful that she always told him she wasn’t ready for s.e.x yet?
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Should he also be grateful for that small voice at the back of his mind that urged him to agree with her?
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No one knew except the both of them of course. She wanted to wait until they gained admission into the university and s.e.x was to be her ‘gift’ to him. Truthfully he had been looking forward to it.
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Sholape however, did not deny him kisses, caresses, and every other thing in between. He was more than familiar with every part of her body as she was with his.
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Shame and regret weighed him down. If only he had listened to Nusrah. If only he had known to remain chaste. If only…
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Remember, Allah’s Mercy overshadows His wrath, Naasir.
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That simple yet weighty expression pierced through the veil of his shame. It presented a ray of hope. Allah may yet forgive him if he repented and took the right steps.
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Nusrah would be the key here as he had been too embarrassed and ashamed to ask Muneer. Besides she had a more intimate perspective on the situation.
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As soon as he reached home, he went straight to the kitchen where he knew he would find Nusrah. She was already peeling the yams
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“Assalamu alaykum, big sis. Ah ah, I said I would do it now.”
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She stopped her peeling and gave him a stern look. “Waalykumsalam warahmatullah, sorry o, Mr Chef. Make I dey go ni?”
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“Ehn, no o!” Naasir exclaimed. “Please stay, I appreciate your help and expert guidance.” He winked at her while also choosing a knife from the rack.
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“In that case, I shall continue to offer my services.” Nusrah bowed with a flourish.
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They continued peeling the yams in silence.
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“It seems you have something on your mind, Ace. What is it? You know you can talk to me.”
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At that moment he was grateful for his sister. She could always tell when something was wrong with him. He turned to her.
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“Don’t say I told you so.” He warned pointing a finger at her. He went on at her quick nod “I want to end things with Sholape but I don’t know how to go about it.”
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Nusrah shrugged, a smirk on her lips. “Well, if you had done this since…”
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Naasir shook his head. “No I told you sos, didn’t I say? I agree I was blind and pigheaded and I should have listened to you. I couldn’t let go then. Now I know better. Just give me pointers please.”
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“Okay, okay. I’m sorry.” Nusrah’s expression turned serious. “ You mentioned she travelled, is she back?”
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Naasir tilted his head at her, an ‘how am I supposed to know’ look on his face.
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“Sorry I forgot. You don’t have your phone so you can’t know. I think you should have some idea though. Didn’t she mention anything the last time you spoke with her?”
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“Erm, she did mention last week that she’d be staying for two weeks. I guess she should be back by next week going by that calculation.”
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“Good. Perhaps Dad would have returned your phone then and you can arrange to meet her in a public place and break the news to her gently?”
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“Or I could just send her a text.” He shrugged, sceptical of that move.
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Nusrah tutted, shaking her head vigorously. “Bad idea. If I were in her shoes, I wouldn’t like that either. I believe she would appreciate you telling it to her face considering how…” She searched for an appropriate word. “…close you both were. It’s just common courtesy.”
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Naasir thought about it and thought about it. He understood Nusrah’s point, yet he knew Sholape well. She would not take it mildly, and he feared the consequences should he break up with her in a public place.
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Finally, he heaved a deep, drawn-out sigh.
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“I’ll pray Istikharah. You too, pray for me o. That Allah should guide my steps.”
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“Always, Ace. I’m really proud of you, sha.”
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Naasir smiled, pleased. He put his arm around her shoulders from behind and squeezed lightly. “I’m glad you are my sister too.”
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Nusrah shrugged her shoulders, trying to get him off her. “You want me to start itching all over? Go and wash your hands jo!”
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They finished peeling the yams and were cleaning them when Nusrah received an SMS on her phone.
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“It’s from Umm Sulaym. She wants me to run an errand real quick.” Nusrah removed her apron. “It seems you’ve got your wish, Na you go cook the asaro (yam porridge) on your own.” She made air quotes at the last statement.
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Naasir stared in shock at the array of ingredients on the table: palm oil, dried fish, mackerel, shredded vegetables, crayfish, blended pepper, and onions. By ‘on his own’ he had meant having Nusrah direct him on how to do it, not actually do the cooking alone from scratch!
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“Nusrah what do we do?!” Panic made his voice rise a notch.
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“No, Ace. You mean: ‘What do I do?’ “
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He gave her a pleading look. She was already at the door. “Help me, please.”
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She laughed heartily. “Okay pay attention because I am only going to say it once.”
“Place the yam in a big pot. Add the pepper blend, salt, bouillon powder, and water. You see the last three ehn, don’t put too much and don’t put too little. You’ve watched us cooking many times so you should be able to gauge the amount. If unsure, taste a bit but remember not to swallow o.”
Cover and let it cook for 10 minutes.
Stir in the Palm oil, sliced onions, and crayfish. Cover again and let it cook extra 10 minutes.
Mash the yams. You can use the turning stick for that. Keep some chunks o, it gives more texture, make we no go dey chop creamy asaro. Then add the fish. Cook for say…” She waved one hand back and forth. “…3 to 5 minutes. Then stir in the Ugwu leaves. Simmer for three minutes and serve. Baarakallahu feek, see you later!”
And she was gone. Nusrah had left him alone in this big kitchen to cook something he had never tried before.
Naasir’s head was swimming but he got the sequence. Yam first, Plam oil second, fish next, Ugwu last.
He took a deep breath and began.
God, please make this meal palatable for my family Aamen.
© Hafsah bint Nurein
2023
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“Those who fornicate, strike each one with a hundred lashes of the whip. Let not pity for the two hold you back from obedience to God if you believe in God and the last day. And let a party of the believers witness their punishment.” (Quran 24:2)