THE CHAMELEON, THE DRUNK & THE FOOL

 

ACT II

 

SCENE ONE

 

A Busy Street

 

Farah seems satisfied with herself. She is seen smiling and counting her earnings from the sale of Mimi’s old, school wardrobe. 

 

Farah

(To herself)

“I struck another good bargain this time. My strategy to not sell to the same thrift seller twice is working. That way they won’t take me for granted. Now to add this to stash at home then take it to the bank next week when I am free. At least I have saved up for next term’s school fees, with enough change for some work on the house. (She finishes counting the money, then switches on her phone so she can be available online to receive trip bookings.  She is about to get in her car when she notices a heavily pregnant woman walking down the street. The young woman struggles with two heavy shopping bags. She is visibly tired and dragging her feet. Soon the young woman’s handbag slips from her shoulder and almost falls. In her attempt to save the bag, she trips on one of the shopping bags and almost falls flat. Instinctively, Farah rushes to her side and prevents the disaster from happening.)

 

Farah.

(Speaking gently)

Careful sister. I’ve got you.  (She helps the young woman stand upright.) “Are you okay?”

 

Huda

(Heaving a sigh of relief.)

I-I am fine. A bit shaken though. (She slings her handbag back around her shoulder) “Thank you so much ma.”

 

Farah.

(Smiling)

Alhamdulillah. I am glad I was here to help.  (Shuffles her feet uncomfortably, unsure whether to say what she is about to.) If I may sis, why don’t you board a taxi or something, given your…eh…condition?”

 

Huda

(Tries to hide her embarrassment with an awkward smile)

“No, I am fine. I felt there was no need since I was almost home. (She pointed down the long street)

 

Farah

(Her gaze followed Huda’s stretched arm, down the street which seemed to stretch on without an end in sight)

“That’s still a long way. In your condition, it will be too much stress for you. (She gestures to her car.) That’s my car over there. I would love to help you home if you don’t mind.”

 

Huda

(Tries to refuse)

No, ma’am. I don’t want to impose…”

 

Farah

Nonsense! You are my sister in Islam. Come on let’s go.

 

Huda

(Relieved and grateful for the help)

“Jazaakumullahu khayran ma. My name is Huda.”

 

Farah

“I’m Farah. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

 

(Both women make their way to the car with Farah carrying Huda’s shopping bags. Curtain.)

 

SCENE TWO

 

Huda’s Residence

 

Both women arrive at Huda’s residence. It’s a one-bedroom, self-contained flat. Huda invites Farah in, and she takes in her surroundings. Though modest, the living room is beautifully furnished with a lone, cream-coloured chaise-longue sofa, and a black and white checkered carpet with matching curtains at the windows. The walls are painted cream too and a beautiful calligraphic painting of Allah’s name (Al Waddud) hung on the wall.  A small coffee table sits at the centre of the room.  Farah is busy making mental notes on which of the decorations she can replicate back at home.

 

Farah helps Huda load the shopping bags into the tiny kitchen, which she notices is also neat with only a few appliances (a gas cooker and small bedside fridge)

 

Farah

(Thinking to herself)

‘At least this one is not as good as standard as my kitchen at home.’

 

While leaving the kitchen, Farah also notices some packages, which she suspects to be baby things, stacked neatly at the far end of the short passage. Huda leads them back to the living room. 

 

Huda

(Smiling warmly)

Thank you so much, ma’am. You are a lifesaver. Jazaakumullahu khayran jiddan.”

 

(Farah smiles and waves her off. She is still subtly looking around the house. Huda remains oblivious to Farah’s actions)

 

Huda

Please take a seat. I must repay your kindness by offering you something to drink. I have soft drink, yoghurt and fruit juice.”

 

Farah

(Shakes her head.)

“Sorry sis. I am afraid I can’t stay.”

 

Huda

(Crestfallen)

“Please, if only for a few minutes. It’s almost Zuhr anyway.”

 

(To Huda’s delight, Farah agrees and settles herself on the sofa while Huda enters the kitchen to prepare Farah’s drink. In a few minutes, both women are seated beside each other, chatting like they have known one another since forever.)

 

Farah

“So tell me. Why were you walking with those heavy bags? Surely, you could have boarded a taxi or at least an okada?”

 

Huda

(Her smile wavered)

“That was my initial plan. However at the market, I found out I only had enough cash left to reach the busstop so I had no choice but to speak to my feet and start walking” (She shrugged)

 

Farah

(Sounding a little surprised)

“But why not leave the shopping to your husband? I am sure he’ll help considering your condition.”

 

Huda

“Oh yes, he does the grocery shopping when he’s home, but today, I woke up with a craving for Tilapia Fish and I can only get those at the main market so I went there. One thing led to another and I’d filled two bags. (She laughed and Farah joined her,)

 

Farah

“You said ‘when he is home’. Is your hubby not in the country?”

 

Huda

(Chuckles)

“Out of the country ke? No, he works very far from here and only comes home during the weekend.“

 

Farah

(Nodding)

“I see. But he should have left you the car now, seeing as you would be needing it the most. You know you shouldn’t be alone all the time, especially in your condition.” (This was Farah’s roundabout way of inquiring about their finances.)

 

Huda

(Laughs self-consciously. It is obvious she is affected by Farah’s question.) 

“No-erm- we don’t own a car, at least not yet. He works as a teacher at a Private Secondary school on the Island so he stays there until the weekend to save transportation costs. It’s only a temporary arrangement though.”

(At Farah’s nod, she quickly changes the subject. “What about you? Do you stay or work around here?”

 

Farah

(Sits up, never one to miss a chance to brag)

“No, I don’t. I came here to conduct business with a client of mine. I am a caterer and a private home chef. I deliver quality meals and cook delicious home-cooked meals for my high-end clients. (She giggles) “I can relate to your being alone because my husband also works offshore and is rarely at home and with my daughter at boarding school in the UK, I decided to kill boredom by indulging my passion. My husband introduced me to a number of his friends and colleagues and here I am.”

 

Huda

(Awestruck by Farah’s words) 

“Wow, maa shaa Allah! You’re doing well for yourself, Barakallahu feekum.”

 

Farah

(Seeing that her words had the effect she wanted, she decided to rub it in the more)

“You know we women shouldn’t let our husbands treat us anyhow. For example, I don’t take any form of nonsense from my husband o.  See, when I was pregnant with my Mimi, I made sure he bought me a car and that he requested to not be sent offshore for the duration of my pregnancy. He was at my beck and call 24/7, and why not? I was carrying his child and I deserved to be pampered. Even when I went to have the baby in Dubai, I made sure we stayed back for at least a month…”

 

Huda

(No longer listening to Farah. Thinking to herself.)

‘She is so put together maa shaa Allah. And there is some truth to what she is saying. What if something happens while Muadhin is away and I can’t reach him or even get to the hospital on time? I am also so lonely here ehn. All my family and his are not in this State. Honestly, I wish this situation would change soon.’  (She finishes her musings by heaving a deep sigh)

 

Farah

(Continued speaking, oblivious that Huda had zoned out on her)

“…so my dear, be smart. You see, when these men start perceiving you as someone who can handle a ‘hard life’ they will not buckle up so that they can take you to the next level! Don’t be a pushover o, when your name is not AdeFarada! Plus you also don’t know what sorts of things he does when he is away from. home…”

(Her phone beeps then. It is a notification from Bolt for a ride request. The passenger is at the bus stop. Farah quickly accepts the ride before standing up to leave)

“I have to leave now. One of my clients just made an impromptu request and needs me to make a special dish ASAP.” (She bends down to hug Huda) “Thank you so much for your hospitality. Since we have exchanged numbers, I’ll make sure to call you and visit often too. Take care, Assalamu alaykum.”

 

Huda

“Waalaykumslam warahmatullah. Bye!”

(As Farah sees herself out, she leaves behind a ‘star-struck’ Huda who now nurses doubts about herself, her husband and their circumstances. Curtain.)

 

SCENE THREE

 

At Farah’s residence.

It is dusk. Farah is seen hurrying home. She greets her neighbours as she passes by their houses and shops. One of them informs her that her husband is back home.  Shocked into speechlessness, she manages to mumble thanks to the neighbour and then begins to walk slowly, her mood dampened by the news.

 

Farah

(To herself)

‘After five months away, he comes back now? And with no word whatsoever. What am I supposed to do with his presence?’ (She is close to the house now, so she quickly removes all her earnings for the day, wraps them in a piece of nylon then tucks it deep into her underwear. At home now, she pushes open the main gate and steps into the compound. Inside she hears voices one of them her husband’s.

“I told you Isma’il, not to let her continue with that Bolt taxi business she is doing. Look at the time and she is not yet back. Who knows where she has gone to or who she went with.”

 

Isma’il

Hmm, my friend I kuku told her to stop. But you know she won’t listen. Imagine her not being home to welcome me back like a good wife should.”

 

Farah burst through the front door to meet a familiar sight that made her eyes sore, no matter how many times she had witnessed it. Her husband and his friend were seated on the sofa sharing a nearly empty plate of nkwobi (cow foot). The centre table boasted several bottles of be.er. Her husband looked up as she walked in.

 

Isma’il

(Hiccuping)

“Ah, Farah! You have finally decided to show your face. Look, my friend, the ice queen is back. Bet me, she will refuse to have fun with us or allow us to continue.”

 

His speech was slurred.  It was obvious he was inebriated, One look from Farah had Isma’il’s friend scrambling to his feet and rushing out the door on unsteady feet. 

 

Farah

(Shaking in anger)

“Isma’il why are you like this? Why do you do this every time?”

 

Isma’il
“What am I doing? I am only having some fun since you refused to welcome me home…”

 

Farah

“Welcome you? How was I supposed to know you would be back today when you didn’t tell me? Besides, in case you didn’t notice I was busy working my head off trying to make money to keep our family afloat!”

 

Isma’il

(Trying to rise, but failing)

“Now, now don’t talk like that. What did you think I was doing too? Don’t worry my new business scheme will take flight this time, you wait and see…”

 

Farah
(Rolling her eyes)

“Please I don’t want to hear about the millionth business idea that will never see the light of day! Get up, let’s get you cleaned up.” (Farah places her hands under his armpits to help him but Isna’il was making her job difficult by resisting. In the end, she got him up but it seemed a dizzy spell overcame him and he swayed violently on his feet before passing out and crashing down on the floor, taking Farah with him.

 

Farah

(In tears) 

“God, why did you saddle me with such a person as my husband?”

 

(She eases herself out from under Isma’il and starts to clear the living room. Curtain.)